ButterTart
Succulent Chinese meal
It's the ranking you never asked for and probably won't read beyond this sentence!
I've never done a ranking on here before, mainly because I don't watch Real Housewives and I can't name many Lady Gaga songs beyond that one about the Edge of Romance. Horror and Christmas are, however, very much in my wheelhouse and, as luck would have it, there's an abundance of films knocking about which marry these two themes into a single, generally underwhelming whole.
My criteria for a Christmas film is that at least part of the film must be set on or around Christmas, which means New Year and Thanksgiving horrors also make the cut (But only as many as were needed to make the list a nice, round number). Remember, my decision on what constitutes a Christmas horror is final and, if you disagree, I would invite you to make your own fucking list.
Helping me on my quest to determine the least shit Christmas horror is beloved festive icon Der Weihnachtstisch . According to legend, this mischievous, chinless little goblin visits Moopy posters each Christmas Eve, just as soon as the pubs shut. Good Moopists receive a copy of Enya's 'And Winter Came' in a padded stocking, while bad Moopists are dragged into the street and subjected to a frenzied knife attack in front of their screaming relatives. Der Weihnachtstisch will rate each film out of ten, and these scores will serve no other function than to give me the chance to use the peeping Tisch smiley a lot.
So, with that rambling load of shite out of the way, I'll whip out my bulging Yuletide sack and reveal our first few turkeys.
I've never done a ranking on here before, mainly because I don't watch Real Housewives and I can't name many Lady Gaga songs beyond that one about the Edge of Romance. Horror and Christmas are, however, very much in my wheelhouse and, as luck would have it, there's an abundance of films knocking about which marry these two themes into a single, generally underwhelming whole.
My criteria for a Christmas film is that at least part of the film must be set on or around Christmas, which means New Year and Thanksgiving horrors also make the cut (But only as many as were needed to make the list a nice, round number). Remember, my decision on what constitutes a Christmas horror is final and, if you disagree, I would invite you to make your own fucking list.
Helping me on my quest to determine the least shit Christmas horror is beloved festive icon Der Weihnachtstisch . According to legend, this mischievous, chinless little goblin visits Moopy posters each Christmas Eve, just as soon as the pubs shut. Good Moopists receive a copy of Enya's 'And Winter Came' in a padded stocking, while bad Moopists are dragged into the street and subjected to a frenzied knife attack in front of their screaming relatives. Der Weihnachtstisch will rate each film out of ten, and these scores will serve no other function than to give me the chance to use the peeping Tisch smiley a lot.
So, with that rambling load of shite out of the way, I'll whip out my bulging Yuletide sack and reveal our first few turkeys.