The Real Housewives of Melbourne

So happy to see Chyka again!
Yes ! She’s just so lovely and warm and yay she‘s back next week too.
Kyla was bit more fun this week, the Janet feud was a but crap really much more up for the evil Anjali storyline
 
Anjali is such a fabulously hateful gremlin character. I'm obsessed with her scenes :D Her pre-loaded grape to raisin analogy KILLED ME :D Who even EATS raisins on the vine?? I couldn't work out whether her "off camera but still being filmed" chat with Kyla about the text messages was staged or they genuinely did think the camera was down.

HOWEVER as entertainingly messy as her scenes are, she's ALL FART NO SHIT with her reluctance to take on the other women, but happy to talk about them to camera. A COWARD!

Also lol at Cherry the flop barely being able to disguise or care anymore about her fake friendship with Anjali during her chat with Jackie :D
 
How can one woman be so singularly iconic

tumblr_o7ns94opA41vrjwbvo1_500.gifv


I ask you
 
Janet like Luann is so fab as she has such an ENVIOUS LIFE, on top of being ICONIC. I’m sure I read the house she lives in is the most expensive in Melbourne.
 
An iconic episode with an iconic ending that had to be ruined by SHINE SHINE SHIT's gender reveal sneak peek in the next eppie.
 
I'm yet to watch this week's episode, but have we seen Anjali's farewell BLOG? :D

In spoilers, but WELL WORTH A READ from our cringe swine queen :disco:
People are really surprised when I say that since I decided to quit the show, I wobble about that decision every day.

I love the way I come across and even when I look like a total wanker, it’s funny.

People call me the villain of the show – and I love that because I’d rather be a villain than an angel. There are no shortage of people calling me the new Gina, and maybe they mean that as an insult, but I take that as the biggest compliment. :D

When Kyla told me that Janet and the other women were determined to find crap on me, to prove that I was a fraud, I knew it was going to get ugly.

During my time on the show I never raised my voice or swore at anyone, but I knew I would have to do that at some point and that could have a massive impact on how future employers see me.

I don’t have a champagne business or a tea brand and I didn’t marry a squillionaire, so my entire currency is my reputation. So, when Kyla said they were going to try to destroy me by looking for dirt, I knew that those people weren’t smart enough to find it, so they’d just invent it.

It all went downhill after Simone’s dinner. I asked Gamble when she thought I would enjoy doing the show, because I wasn't.

Her answer was to send me an absolute torrent of abusive messages that made no sense when I was at home sick. It was like I had said I was going to come round to her house to murder her family - that’s when I started to think about leaving.

I was bored, stressed and I had a dark feeling. Straight after the texts came, Kyla said that she’d heard that Janet and Jackie had broken into my apartment, and it freaked me out.

I had to get security footage to prove to myself that it wasn’t true. I have photos to prove I live there! They haven’t even been inside so how can they have looked in cupboards?


Of course, I could have stood up to Janet and Gamble and probably won, but at the time I was getting quite depressed and stressed about what I would have to say or do.

I don’t care how much Dolce and Gabbana you put on a sewer rat, it’s still a sewer rat and I would have had to fight them on that dirty level.

Off-screen, Kyla also told me that Janet was so annoyed with me, she wanted to uninvite me from her tea advert and I was actually delighted.

She had refused to organise hair and make-up for any of us on the day and if I’d gone, I would have turned up with no make-up and wet hair anyway, just to see her face.

Have I seen them since I quit? Yes, because we had to take some publicity pictures, but I steered clear of Janet, Gamble and Simone for most of the day.

Janet is like the snake out of The Jungle Book – she has this slimy vibe where she is the same to people if she likes them or she hates them. Jackie was great to me, and Simone was just Simone.

I have zero affection for them. Janet has been going after me so much on social media, I think she’s obsessed with me.

Gamble sent me some lovely messages a couple of months ago, and I really appreciated it.

But then she saw how much attention a fight between me and Janet was getting on social media and she tried to start her own war with me, but I gave her nothing. Nothing says f*** you like silence.

Now that I have gone, people ask me if I will watch the rest of the season and the answer is definitely yes - I want to see what happens to those women, just like everyone else.



I wish they'd shown a bit more of this on the show, and delved in a bit deeper. Gamble and the drunken text messages in particular needed airing out on screen. I think the show is probably protecting Gamble by having it all play out offscreen, as imagine the messages she sent to Anjali were VILE!
 
Four episodes into season 5 and it is just so gosh darn entertaining. We’ve laughed and we’ve cried and its all just been so watchable. Janet might be my favourite housewife of all time :disco:

And re: Classy - what a genuinely great pop song. Makes me emotional.
 
I'm yet to watch this week's episode, but have we seen Anjali's farewell BLOG? :D

In spoilers, but WELL WORTH A READ from our cringe swine queen :disco:
People are really surprised when I say that since I decided to quit the show, I wobble about that decision every day.

I love the way I come across and even when I look like a total wanker, it’s funny.

People call me the villain of the show – and I love that because I’d rather be a villain than an angel. There are no shortage of people calling me the new Gina, and maybe they mean that as an insult, but I take that as the biggest compliment. :D

When Kyla told me that Janet and the other women were determined to find crap on me, to prove that I was a fraud, I knew it was going to get ugly.

During my time on the show I never raised my voice or swore at anyone, but I knew I would have to do that at some point and that could have a massive impact on how future employers see me.

I don’t have a champagne business or a tea brand and I didn’t marry a squillionaire, so my entire currency is my reputation. So, when Kyla said they were going to try to destroy me by looking for dirt, I knew that those people weren’t smart enough to find it, so they’d just invent it.

It all went downhill after Simone’s dinner. I asked Gamble when she thought I would enjoy doing the show, because I wasn't.

Her answer was to send me an absolute torrent of abusive messages that made no sense when I was at home sick. It was like I had said I was going to come round to her house to murder her family - that’s when I started to think about leaving.

I was bored, stressed and I had a dark feeling. Straight after the texts came, Kyla said that she’d heard that Janet and Jackie had broken into my apartment, and it freaked me out.

I had to get security footage to prove to myself that it wasn’t true. I have photos to prove I live there! They haven’t even been inside so how can they have looked in cupboards?


Of course, I could have stood up to Janet and Gamble and probably won, but at the time I was getting quite depressed and stressed about what I would have to say or do.

I don’t care how much Dolce and Gabbana you put on a sewer rat, it’s still a sewer rat and I would have had to fight them on that dirty level.

Off-screen, Kyla also told me that Janet was so annoyed with me, she wanted to uninvite me from her tea advert and I was actually delighted.

She had refused to organise hair and make-up for any of us on the day and if I’d gone, I would have turned up with no make-up and wet hair anyway, just to see her face.

Have I seen them since I quit? Yes, because we had to take some publicity pictures, but I steered clear of Janet, Gamble and Simone for most of the day.

Janet is like the snake out of The Jungle Book – she has this slimy vibe where she is the same to people if she likes them or she hates them. Jackie was great to me, and Simone was just Simone.

I have zero affection for them. Janet has been going after me so much on social media, I think she’s obsessed with me.

Gamble sent me some lovely messages a couple of months ago, and I really appreciated it.

But then she saw how much attention a fight between me and Janet was getting on social media and she tried to start her own war with me, but I gave her nothing. Nothing says f*** you like silence.

Now that I have gone, people ask me if I will watch the rest of the season and the answer is definitely yes - I want to see what happens to those women, just like everyone else.

I wish they'd shown a bit more of this on the show, and delved in a bit deeper. Gamble and the drunken text messages in particular needed airing out on screen. I think the show is probably protecting Gamble by having it all play out offscreen, as imagine the messages she sent to Anjali were VILE!
Not buying that. And also: if you can't stand the heat and all that.
 
I'm yet to watch this week's episode, but have we seen Anjali's farewell BLOG? :D

In spoilers, but WELL WORTH A READ from our cringe swine queen :disco:
People are really surprised when I say that since I decided to quit the show, I wobble about that decision every day.

I love the way I come across and even when I look like a total wanker, it’s funny.

People call me the villain of the show – and I love that because I’d rather be a villain than an angel. There are no shortage of people calling me the new Gina, and maybe they mean that as an insult, but I take that as the biggest compliment. :D

When Kyla told me that Janet and the other women were determined to find crap on me, to prove that I was a fraud, I knew it was going to get ugly.

During my time on the show I never raised my voice or swore at anyone, but I knew I would have to do that at some point and that could have a massive impact on how future employers see me.

I don’t have a champagne business or a tea brand and I didn’t marry a squillionaire, so my entire currency is my reputation. So, when Kyla said they were going to try to destroy me by looking for dirt, I knew that those people weren’t smart enough to find it, so they’d just invent it.

It all went downhill after Simone’s dinner. I asked Gamble when she thought I would enjoy doing the show, because I wasn't.

Her answer was to send me an absolute torrent of abusive messages that made no sense when I was at home sick. It was like I had said I was going to come round to her house to murder her family - that’s when I started to think about leaving.

I was bored, stressed and I had a dark feeling. Straight after the texts came, Kyla said that she’d heard that Janet and Jackie had broken into my apartment, and it freaked me out.

I had to get security footage to prove to myself that it wasn’t true. I have photos to prove I live there! They haven’t even been inside so how can they have looked in cupboards?


Of course, I could have stood up to Janet and Gamble and probably won, but at the time I was getting quite depressed and stressed about what I would have to say or do.

I don’t care how much Dolce and Gabbana you put on a sewer rat, it’s still a sewer rat and I would have had to fight them on that dirty level.

Off-screen, Kyla also told me that Janet was so annoyed with me, she wanted to uninvite me from her tea advert and I was actually delighted.

She had refused to organise hair and make-up for any of us on the day and if I’d gone, I would have turned up with no make-up and wet hair anyway, just to see her face.

Have I seen them since I quit? Yes, because we had to take some publicity pictures, but I steered clear of Janet, Gamble and Simone for most of the day.

Janet is like the snake out of The Jungle Book – she has this slimy vibe where she is the same to people if she likes them or she hates them. Jackie was great to me, and Simone was just Simone.

I have zero affection for them. Janet has been going after me so much on social media, I think she’s obsessed with me.

Gamble sent me some lovely messages a couple of months ago, and I really appreciated it.

But then she saw how much attention a fight between me and Janet was getting on social media and she tried to start her own war with me, but I gave her nothing. Nothing says f*** you like silence.

Now that I have gone, people ask me if I will watch the rest of the season and the answer is definitely yes - I want to see what happens to those women, just like everyone else.

I wish they'd shown a bit more of this on the show, and delved in a bit deeper. Gamble and the drunken text messages in particular needed airing out on screen. I think the show is probably protecting Gamble by having it all play out offscreen, as imagine the messages she sent to Anjali were VILE!
I listened to Jackie’s Shine it Up :manson: podcast where she was talking to Gina and she mentioned that she had to keep telling one of the newbies that she needed to stop trying to act like Gina :D
Everything about her was so try hard. Every “funny” line had been planned nothing felt spontaneous
 
I haven't watched it yet, but apparently this week's episode is a chaotic classic! :disco:

Also, this is clearly NOT VERY NICE of the Australian press - but the messy bitch inside of me kind of loves the truth REVEALED!


The question remains - why DID Anjali sign up for the show in the first place, if everything she was presenting was a lie? I don't doubt that production organised the apartment for her as some sort of deal with the real estate that owned it (I doubt she even SLEPT THERE, it was probably just used as a filming location), but surely she must have known she'd have been rumbled sooner or later :D

The amount of fakery this season is unprecedented, even for a Housewives show.
 
Disappointed we didn’t get a full CONCERT. Classy needs primetime exposure
 
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