Nancy’s Christmas Tips

[Nancy]

WRAP YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENTS USING FOOD PACKAGING TO SAVE ON WRAPPING PAPER AND DO YOUR BIT FOR THE ENVIRONMENT.

 

[Lucille]

What, like OLD BAGS OF CRISPS?

 

[Zu]

What, like OLD BAGS OF CRISPS?

Sounds ideal for MUM’S TWEED

 

[Zu]

“There’s no Corn Flakes in it Auntie - I know you’re a fan!”

 

[Nancy]

What, like OLD BAGS OF CRISPS?

LIKE GIFT A BOOK INSIDE A FROZEN PIZZA BOX.

JUST HAD A THOUGHT; YOU COULD CUT A CRISP BAG INTO STRIPS THEN CURL AND STICK THEM ON TO THE BOX FOR ADDED DECORATION.

 

[GinAg (39)]

SEND RELATIVES YOUR OWN SHIT BY THROWING IT AT THEM.

THE SHIT IS RECYCLED FOOD AND THROWING IT IS GOOD FOR THE ENVIRONMENT AS NO CO2 IS EMMITED AND NO HARMFUL WRAPPING USED.

 

[Nancy]

FILL FESTIVE OR COLOURFUL SOCKS WITH SOIL (OR SCRUNCHED UP PAGES OF A MAGAZINE) AND HANG THEM FROM YOUR TREE AS A DECORATION.

 

[Soldi]

WRAP YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENTS USING FOOD PACKAGING TO SAVE ON WRAPPING PAPER AND DO YOUR BIT FOR THE ENVIRONMENT.

WTF?

I’ve brought some environmentally friendly wrapping paper this year and the amount of gifts I send depends on how much there is as I ain’t ordering another roll.

 

[Lucille]

Nothing says I’M OFF THE DRUGS quite like a book in a pizza box and a flat decorated with OLD SOCKS filled with DIRT.

 

[GinAg (39)]

Nothing says I’M OFF THE DRUGS quite like a book in a pizza box and a flat decorated with OLD SOCKS filled with DIRT.

 

[lolly]

WTF?

I’ve brought some environmentally friendly wrapping paper this year and the amount of gifts I send depends on how much there is as I ain’t ordering another roll.

I did some eco brown paper and tape last year, and then used stamps to decorate it all.

FUCK THAT this year. FAR TOO MUCH WORK.

 

[GinAg (39)]

INSTEAD OF TURKEY EAT YOUR DEAD PETS

NO DEAD PETS? SIMPLE! JUST KILL STRAY NEIGHBOURHOOD CATS OR NANS.

 

[RJN]

If you alienate all of your friends and family, you save money on gifts for them!

 

[Star]

I did some eco brown paper and tape last year, and then used stamps to decorate it all.

FUCK THAT this year. FAR TOO MUCH WORK.

You can actually do tape free packing you know. YouTube it.

 

[lolly]

INSTEAD OF TURKEY EAT YOUR DEAD PETS

NO DEAD PETS? SIMPLE! JUST KILL STRAY NEIGHBOURHOOD CATS OR NANS.

NANCY IS VEGAN

BUT I UNDERSTAND IF YOU MISSED IT

 

[Star]

Nothing says I’M OFF THE DRUGS quite like a book in a pizza box and a flat decorated with OLD SOCKS filled with DIRT.

INSTEAD OF TURKEY EAT YOUR DEAD PETS

NO DEAD PETS? SIMPLE! JUST KILL STRAY NEIGHBOURHOOD CATS OR NANS.

This thread is making me laugh too much!

 

[Star]

NANCY IS VEGAN

BUT I UNDERSTAND IF YOU MISSED IT

Oh stop

 

[Soldi]

You can actually do tape free packing you know. YouTube it.

Is it easier? I’m usually sat pissed in some sellotape hell on Christmas Eve.

 

[lolly]

You can actually do tape free packing you know. YouTube it.

Too late. I've already bought something that will really cheer up landfill.

 

[Rita]

LIKE GIFT A BOOK INSIDE A FROZEN PIZZA BOX.

JUST HAD A THOUGHT; YOU COULD CUT A CRISP BAG INTO STRIPS THEN CURL AND STICK THEM ON TO THE BOX FOR ADDED DECORATION.

Your POOR MOTHER.

 

[GinAg (39)]

GIVE YOUR FRIENDS LOFT INSTALLATION INSTEAD OF CHRISTMAS JUMPERS

 

[GinAg (39)]

pissed in some sellotape

abstract

 

[lolly]

Your POOR MOTHER.

And to think I accused @Lucille of NOT THINKING ENOUGH!

I APOLOGISE PROFUSELY

 

[COB]

If you alienate all of your friends and family, you save money on gifts for them!

Way ahead of you!

 

[Rita]

GIVE YOUR FRIENDS LOFT INSTALLATION INSTEAD OF CHRISTMAS JUMPERS

Yes, let’s install lofts in place of gifting Christmas jumpers this Yuletide.

 

[COB]

FILL FESTIVE OR COLOURFUL SOCKS WITH SOIL (OR SCRUNCHED UP PAGES OF A MAGAZINE) AND HANG THEM FROM YOUR TREE AS A DECORATION.

You can't MAKE ME!

 

[Zu]

LIKE GIFT A BOOK INSIDE A FROZEN PIZZA BOX.

JUST HAD A THOUGHT; YOU COULD CUT A CRISP BAG INTO STRIPS THEN CURL AND STICK THEM ON TO THE BOX FOR ADDED DECORATION.

FILL FESTIVE OR COLOURFUL SOCKS WITH SOIL (OR SCRUNCHED UP PAGES OF A MAGAZINE) AND HANG THEM FROM YOUR TREE AS A DECORATION.

Honestly this level of lunacy is bringing dear departed Untitled to mind

 

[Soldi]

FILL FESTIVE OR COLOURFUL SOCKS WITH SOIL (OR SCRUNCHED UP PAGES OF A MAGAZINE) AND HANG THEM FROM YOUR TREE AS A DECORATION.

Ooh I’ve an idea!

 

[GinAg (39)]

Surprised no-one's gone for my shit throwing idea. Greta started it last year.

Poor Malena.

 

[Eddie]

BRINE your poultry.

 

[Nancy]

I HAVE ONLY REUNITED PROPERLY WITH MY MOTHER THIS YEAR, BUT SHE WILL BE GETTING A GIFT WRAPPED IN FROZEN VEGETABLE BAGS

 

[GinAg (39)]

I'M ONLY GIVING MY MUM FROZEN VEGETABLES BAGS.

 

[Rita]

I HAVE ONLY REUNITED PROPERLY WITH MY MOTHER THIS YEAR, BUT SHE WILL BE GETTING A GIFT WRAPPED IN FROZEN VEGETABLE BAGS

DON’T! She will think you still HATE her.

 

[lolly]

I'M ONLY GIVING MY MUM FROZEN VEGETABLES BAGS.

ME TOO

BUT I'M PUTTING THEM IN A LOVELY BOX FROM PAPERCHASE

 

[GinAg (39)]

ME TOO

BUT I'M PUTTING THEM IN A LOVELY BOX FROM PAPERCHASE

I WAS GOING TO WRAP MINE IN FOIS GRAS AND A COAL BURNING PLANT AND THEN DUMP IT ALL IN A RIVER

 

[lolly]

 

[Nancy]

YOU CAN ALSO MAKE CHRISTMAS A LOT CHEAPER BY DELAYING IT BY TWO DAYS TO THE 27TH INSTEAD AND BUYING ALL THE REDUCED CHRISTMAS FOOD IN THE SUPERMARKETS ON BOXING DAY.

FOR ADDED REALISM, YOU CAN RECORD THE CHRISTMAS DAY TV INCLUDING THE NEWS AND WATCH IT ON THE 27TH TOO.

 

[Nancy]

OR USE IPLAYER

 

[Lucille]

MAKE CHRISTMAS CHEAPER BY SLAUGHTERING YOUR LEAST FAVOURED CHILD.

 

[lolly]