Christina Aguilera, Pink, Lil' Kim & Mya - Lady Marmalade

Créole Lady Marma-laaaaaaa-aaaaaaaaaaadde

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This has caused me to dig up what I wrote about this back in 012

Loufoque said:
14 LADY MARMALADE (featuring Pink, Lil' Kim, Mya & Missy Elliott)

Average: 6.89
Year: 2001
Chart peak: #1 (US), #1 (UK)

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Signature look: A Parisian prostitute circa 1900 with FULL BLOWN AIDS before AIDS was FASHIONABLE
Screams out of 10: 16
Collateral damage: Pink, Mya and Lil' Kim's relevance on the track
Cuntiest moment: "What's the high part? What's the most singing part? Christina's gonna take that part" AND SHE DID :disco:
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And so onto one of the most memorable pop moments of the last 15 years. Show me a queen who doesn't know this song and I will show you a closet straight. Because in many ways, this is the shining example of how to bring together an all-star cast (well, all-stars and Mya) and create something truly greater than the sum of its parts. In the years leading up to 2001, Pink, Mya and Lil' Kim had all established names for themselves, scoring Top 10 hits in the US and abroad, but none had quite managed to make their mark with a worldwide smash. This song gave them their moment. A worldwide #1 which was not only a massive hit, but felt like an actual EVENT.

But let's get one thing straight: Lady Marmalade in 2001 was all about Christina. You can't fault the other girls of course. Mya's sultry nox set the tone for what is to come; Pink's rough but powerful delivery recalls a formidable 50 year-putain with a 50-a-day habit; and, well, let's face it, Lil' Kim has clearly taken so many BCs in her life that her place in the line-up is not even up for debate.

But, for all their efforts, these girls were upstaged in every way imaginable. Despite Pink's protestations, Christina did indeed take the high-part, the most-singing part, the cliMAX to the most MAX of tracks. As a 15yo vox queen, you can't imagine how many hours I spent perfecting my lipping technique to Xtina's vocal EXPLOSION. It was definitely over 100.

It wasn't all about the vox, however. Oh no, they were actually only incidental to the absolutely absurd image overhaul that accompanied the track. As early as 2000, Christina had shown signs that she wanted to push her image in a more edgy direction. But nothing quite prepared the world for the full-blown spindly-legged trannification that took place for the release of this single. The CHEVEUX, the MAQUILLAGE, the ENSEMBLE. It was possibly the most outrageously DISGUSTING look ever created by a global superstar. And ironically, it did the trick. All eyes were on Christina as she bellowed alongside her co-stars. Mya might have looked prettier, Pink may have have the better body, and Lil' Kim the best tits, but you couldn't HELP but be transfixed by the utter STATE that Christina had become.

That said, Christina was still a rookie. As much as she could show up her contemporaries, she still had a lot to learn. Watch below as Ms Patti LaBelle ascends the Grammy stage, dressed as a pink wedding cake, SHRIEKING like a BANSHEE, as if to show Christina just HOW it's DONE.

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10s: Christian, Whatevar, Jark, Tischlampe, Raspberry Swirl, Kevin, Dance In The Dark
0s: monsta
-1s: Slave, ameraal
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I more or less hate it. I was mildly bemused by the sheer absurdity of it at the time. It has some passable moments. But basically it's rubbish.
 
I've never realised that Chrissie misses every single high note on that MTV perf. OUTRAGEOUS!
 
Christina and Lil Kim are the dreamteam :disco: P!nk's bit is great, but then comes the GREATEST RAP OF ALL TIME followed by those foghorned 'HEY HEY HEY's and it becomes an 11/10.
 
It's really just a servicable retread until Ms Chris crawls out of the turn-of-century Parisian gutter, MAQUILLÉE à la TRUELLE, and delivers THOSE VOX :disco:
 
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I loved it at the time but I can't bear it now, maybe in twenty years.
 
My favourite bit will always be Missy's utterly superfluous inclusion - I wonder how much she got paid for turning up and saying everyone's names in turn? She can't even be arsed to do her sections LIVE (or mime them properly) in that Grammy perf :D

EDIT: Unless of course all this was an early symptom of her Graves Disease, in which case I apologise profusely :(
 
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That's fair enough, but I've always thought she sounded a bit silly on this (and I'd call myself a fan normally).
 
Loufoque said:
Chrissy, we call those the GRAMMYS :disco:
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OOPS :D

Still, this is a moment to end all moments. I have a happy memory of buying the Moulin Rouge! soundtrack in L.A. (man) before the film came out and having a SEIZURE when the CD hit track 2. I couldn't wait to see it in the film - too bad it got tossed aside in the midst of some awful Fatboy Slim cacophony.
 
Let's show some love for the PULSE QUICKENING Thunderpuss single edit.

It's like an aural heart attack!
 
I actually quite like this. Some songs are too good for even her to ruin.

Lil Kim's rap is SO the highlight.

We independent women
Some mistake us for whores
I'm sayin' WHY SPEND MINE?
When I can spend YOURS
Disagree, well that's you and I'm sorry
Imma keep playing these dudes out like Atari
Wearin' high heel shoes
Gettin' love from the dudes
Four badass chicks from the Moulin Rouge

:disco:
 
Lil' Kim's bit is mighty/ridiculous but come on, even the most ardent 24/7 XTina hater could not deny that her paint stripping entry into this ("Hey! HEY! HEEEEEEEEAYAYAYAYAYAAYEY!") and subsequent bonkers verse are some kind of pinnacle of pop itself, not just this song.
 
Not keen.

It does represent a small amount of time in the pop landscape though.

Don't want to really hear it again either.
 
The All Saints version has aged absolutely horribly. It sounds horrendous these days.
 
VoR said:
The All Saints version has aged absolutely horribly. It sounds horrendous these days.
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It is dated but a lot more fun than this shriekfest. Plus I love Shaznays shonky rapping so much.
The memory of the Under The Bridge/Lady Marmalade videos being played at the cinema before a screening of Jackie Brown has cemented it as a teenage pop dream come true.
 
I love their version of Under The Bridge. I don't care if none of them had picked up a crack pipe in their lives, they're all much better singers than that honking cunt Anthony Kiedis, and the harmonies are great.
 
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I loved this at the time (Missy's bit was a comedy classic even then) but I couldn't listen to it now.
 
VoR said:
I love their version of Under The Bridge. I don't care if none of them had picked up a crack pipe in their lives, they're all much better singers than that honking cunt Anthony Kiedis, and the harmonies are great.
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I totally agree with that appraisal of the All Saints version of Under The Bridge, it's great.

I wouldn't be quite so quick to dismiss the Red Hot Chilli Peppers though. I'm not hugely familar with their output, but songs like "Californication" and "Scar Tissue" are quite stunning.
 
Christian said:
Lil' Kim's bit is mighty/ridiculous but come on, even the most ardent 24/7 XTina hater could not deny that her paint stripping entry into this ("Hey! HEY! HEEEEEEEEAYAYAYAYAYAAYEY!") and subsequent bonkers verse are some kind of pinnacle of pop itself, not just this song.
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It's truly a moment of life

Anyone who denies it is just lying to themselves
 
NOTHING LESS THAN A 10!

Imagine what a 2013 versión of this hot mess would be like

Nicki Minaj as Lil'Kim
Katy Perry as Mya
Lady Gaga as Christina
Rihanna as P!nk

MESS :disco:
 
Christian said:
I totally agree with that appraisal of the All Saints version of Under The Bridge, it's great.

I wouldn't be quite so quick to dismiss the Red Hot Chilli Peppers though. I'm not hugely familar with their output, but songs like "Californication" and "Scar Tissue" are quite stunning.
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Absolutely! I too like the All Saints version but the original, like many many RHCP songs, is great.
 
Pipo said:
NOTHING LESS THAN A 10!

Imagine what a 2013 versión of this hot mess would be like

Nicki Minaj as Lil'Kim
Katy Perry as Mya
Lady Gaga as Christina
Rihanna as P!nk

MESS :disco:
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Poor Katy Perry is NOT a Mya.

The reality would probably be a Dr Luke reading, opening with Bonnie McKee trying to channel Lolita but instead looking like mutton dressed as Little Mix, before moving on to Ke$ha channeling P!nk. Lil Kim would be replaced by superstar rapper Sabi, or maybe Becky G, and then Christina's moment of life would be transformed into a moment of death by Jessie J, honking and hollering her way through the final minute dressed in nipple tassles and a diaper with her face contorted into a nightmarish gurn.
 
You know, out of the original lot and the new lot, P!nk could still be P!nk!
 
True. P!nk is the true survivor of the class of 2001. None of the rest could get arrested these days!
 
Lou would Banshee scream differently about Xtina but it's so true!

GOD BLESS PINK!
 
Loufoque said:
This has caused me to dig up what I wrote about this back in 012
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A friend of mine asked me today if I knew what is to BELLOW so I showed her the Patti LaBelle part. Thank you Loufoque! There are things that can't be translated directly. In Finnish I'd say huutaa or rääkyä (yell or shout) but that wouldn't do justice for the Performance!
 
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