VoR
Take it or leave it
1. Charlotte Perrelli - Still Young
(Thomas G:son, Bobby Ljunggren, Erik Bernholm, Charlie Gustavsson)
From the moment she wrapped her greyscale claw around that bejewelled microphone, Charlotte Perrelli cemented herself as nothing less than an icon. Along with Carola (patron saint of religious lunatics) and Lena (patron saint of herpes superspreaders), she completes the holy trinity of 00s Schlager divas. But unlike the other two, she doesn't *really* have any notable hits outside her iconic 1-2 punch of Melfest winners.(Thomas G:son, Bobby Ljunggren, Erik Bernholm, Charlie Gustavsson)
Not that she has a God damn thing to prove, but I guess what I'm saying is that where Lena and Carola have long-since ascended, Charlotte is still in a faintly unhealthy relationship with mistress Melfest, a lover who once gave her the best shag of her life, and now keeps finding ever more cruel ways to fuck her over.
And in that sense, really, isn't she just an avatar for all of us? Come on Melfest, cut our girl some slack. In a very real sense, she made you what you are today, and the day she finally hangs up her pumps will truly be the day the music dies.
2. Emil Assergård - Om allting skiter sig
(Emil Assergård, Jimmy Jansson, Jimmy "Joker" Thörnfeldt, Anderz Wrethov, Johanna Wrethov)
(Emil Assergård, Jimmy Jansson, Jimmy "Joker" Thörnfeldt, Anderz Wrethov, Johanna Wrethov)
Oh, who cares?
3. Klara Hammarström - Beat of Broken Hearts
(David Kreuger, Fredrik Kempe, Niklas Carson Mattson, Andreas Wijk)
There's something about Klara Hammarström that I just don't trust. Her 2020 entry was pleasant enough, but I just can't shake the suspicion that she was produced in an unlisted facility from the re-harvested organs of ISA, Lisa Ajax and half of Timoteij.(David Kreuger, Fredrik Kempe, Niklas Carson Mattson, Andreas Wijk)
She was mostly just there to be the salt in Linda Bengtzing's open wound on that occasion, but according to the stage notes, it seems somebody's throwing a fair amount of kronor at her this time around. Whether that indicates confidence in a winnable song or just hurling good money after bad remains to be seen, but even if she finishes 5th or below again, they'll only melt her down for slurry and rebrand her as Olivia Pettersson in time for next year's Contest. They just don't make 'em like they used to...
4. Mustasch - Contagious
(Ralf Gyllenhammar, David Johannesson)
Appearing primarily to provide musical counter-programming for SVT and nightmare fuel for balloon-waving Swedish infants, Mustasch are a big local name and the strongest contender to crush our dreams forever in a Globen or Bust moment come Saturday.(Ralf Gyllenhammar, David Johannesson)
Lead singer Ralf Gyllenhammar was actually quite acceptable in 2013, but that was notably the worst Melodifestivelen of all time, and anything that wasn't slurred out by a mediocre white twink sounded like Dansa i neon by comparison. Still, if he brings a similar level of theatricality in a group setting I'm not guaranteed to hate this on its own terms. It's just... well, I'm sorry, but you just KNOW how this is going to go down, don't you?
5. Elisa - Den du är
(Bobby Ljunggren, Ingela "Pling" Forsman, Elisa Lindström)
There are definite shades of 'beloved 90s TV presenter who outs herself as a right wing TERF on the socials' about this image, aren't there?(Bobby Ljunggren, Ingela "Pling" Forsman, Elisa Lindström)
Elisa is indeed a bit beloved by the Swedish public by all accounts (mine). She's already won just about every local reality contest going, and her former group Elisa's can still be heard blasting out of provincial weddings and complex needs rehabilitation clinics from Malmö to Kiruna.
Her sole previous Melfest entry was a bit of a half-baked schlag-"eh" letdown, so she's trying her hand with a classic ballad this time around, penned by no less a figure than Ingela 'Pling' Forsman. It's been many a year since one of these made the final - our Shirl basically killed the genre stone dead with one flash of her cold cut thighs back in 2009, and they never truly recovered.
Will Elisa's popularity be enough to spark a revival? This seems like such an obvious donkey that I'm perversely feeling that maybe it WILL. In any other semi, I'd be rooting for it. But I'm afraid the stakes are just to high here. Hopefully Perrelli has a well-timed shove down a flight of stairs with Elisa's name on it...
6. Alvaro Estrella - Baila Baila
(Anderz Wrethov, Linnea Deb, Jimmy "Joker" Thörnfeldt)
For many years, Alvaro Estrella's unhappy legacy was as one of the most spectacular shit the bed performances in modern Melfest history, after he made the bold choice of interpreting a hotly-tipped sex banger in the style of a man who'd been caught cry-wanking into a family photo album by his own mother minutes before going onstage.(Anderz Wrethov, Linnea Deb, Jimmy "Joker" Thörnfeldt)
A passable supporting turn with Mendez (73) last year restored his credibility enough to warrant a second stab at a solo career this time around. Everything about this entry screams basic, generic AC-fodder, and it is in that context I fully expect to mildly enjoy it before entirely forgetting that it ever existed by March.
7. Tusse - Voices
(Joy Deb, Linnea Deb, Jimmy "Joker" Thörnfeldt, Anderz Wrethov)
Tusse recently won the 187th season of Swedish Idol, in a run that included a spirited go at Rise Like a Phoenix that suggested he had eyes on a bigger prize. With youth, talent and a profile on his side, he's this semi's biggest shoe-in for the finals on paper.(Joy Deb, Linnea Deb, Jimmy "Joker" Thörnfeldt, Anderz Wrethov)
Winning the whole thing on your first time out is rare, though not unheard of, but in a year dominated by returnees, his fresh-faced appeal isn't to be discounted. If not, expect to see him again with even more momentum come 2022.
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